International Noise Conference celebrates its 10th anniversary at Churchill’s Pub

Frank Falestra is standing at the backyard bar of Churchill’s Pub, tinkering with a lighting board that has a broken switch.

It’s an urgent repair because the switch controls red light.

“Red is important at a rock bar,” he says.

Falestra, better known as Rat Bastard, is hailed as the godfather of Miami’s noise scene and the founder of International Noise Conference, an annual festival celebrating musical nonconformity.

Every year, the festival draws hundreds to three-decades-old Churchill’s Pub, where noise fans and other revelers gather to sing, dance, screech and, sometimes, bloody each other’s noses.

International Noise Conference will kick off its 10th year starting 10 p.m. Wednesday at Churchill’s, 5501 NE Second Ave. The festival continues at 9 p.m. Thursday, 8 p.m. Friday and 3 p.m. Saturday.

Falestra, 54, expects more than 100 bands to show up. That number is about the same as the last few years, but the fourth night of the festival is new, thanks to funding from the Knight Foundation’s Knight Arts Challenge.

Admission to the festival, as always, is free.

“We keep the money thing completely out of it,” Falestra said. “That’s probably why it’s still going.”

There are only two hard-and-fast rules for musicians performing at INC: no laptops, and get off the stage in 15 minutes or less.

The laptop rule is to prevent the show from getting boring, Falestra says.

But the time limit? Artists have flown all the way from France and Australia to perform at INC. And they only get 15 minutes?

According to Falestra, a 30-year veteran of the Miami music scene, that’s all you need to get the point across.

“Usually 20 minutes of anybody is too much,” he said. “Like the Foo Fighters. You wouldn’t want to see them for 20 minutes. Ten minutes would kill you.”

Page 27, a Denver-based noise band, has one of the farthest commutes on the set list this year. Like most of the other bands, INC is the only show pulling Page 27 away from its hometown this time of year.

But member John Gross, 35, said the band is looking forward to the networking opportunities as much as the brief set. The best part for him, he said, is going to the tables in the back of the bar to trade CDs, tapes and records with other bands. “You end up finding a lot of music that you don’t see anywhere else,” Gross said.

The first two days of the festival, which feature local bands almost exclusively, are heavy on different music genres. Thursday is usually the most outrageous night. Sometimes, Falestra says, people get naked.

Many of the bands will play noise sets regardless of their typical musical style. This might include an avant-garde mix of improvisational drumming, playing non-musical objects such as sheets of glass or screaming into a microphone.

Novice noise fans shouldn’t be afraid, though. In spite of its name, INC doesn’t require that every set consist of noise. It’s possible to hear something approaching listenable music at the show.

Although he disdains the pop-punk bands that flood college radio stations these days (he has a particular distaste for Green Day), Falestra said he’s not averse to tossing more mainstream acts into the lineup to keep things from getting predictable.

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Stars Without Makeup!

Katie Couric

February 05, 2013

A makeup-free, 50-something Katie Couric was all smiles as she arrived fresh faced to LAX on Feb. 5, 2013.

ALSO IN THIS GALLERY:

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Fla. judge: No trial delay in Trayvon Martin case

SANFORD, Fla. — A judge in the case of a former neighborhood watch leader accused of shooting Florida teenager Trayvon Martin has denied a defense request to delay the trial.

George Zimmerman's attorneys presented a motion Tuesday asking Judge Debra Nelson to push the trial from mid-June back to November. They say the prosecutor has been slow in turning over needed evidence. The state attorney denied the accusation.

Judge Debra Nelson noted Zimmerman's lead attorney had been in the case nearly a year and says the problems he's having getting evidence are not insurmountable.

Splash News

Slain teen Trayvon Martin

Zimmerman is claiming he acted in self-defense in shooting Martin last year and has pleaded not guilty to second-degree murder.

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Cutting edge tech from Swiss Army

The Victorinox Swiss Army Jetsetter looks like a traditional pocket knife the company is famous for, but instead of the knife you get a pocket full of storage.

A foldout and detachable USB 2.0 flash drive is among the features in the mini tool kit, which includes a ball point pen, bottle opener, Phillips screwdriver, tweezers and scissors in the 16 GB model I tested out.

The detachable flash drive is Windows- and Mac-friendly, although it comes loaded with Mac-friendly security software to protect your data stored on the device.

It’s available in capacities of 8 GB black ($39.95), 16 GB red ($49.99) and 32 GB silver ($99.99). There are a few different features in each, with the 32 GB model having a LED mini light, for example.

Details: www.swissarmy.com

A great find

Kensington’s Proximo Fob and Tag Kit creates a wireless (Bluetooth) monitoring system between your keys, accessories and an iPhone (4S or 5) that will alert you if they are separated.

I tried the starter kit ($59.99), which includes a fob, tag, keyring and has a screen driver to open the hardware and insert the included CR2032 lithium coin batteries, along with a key ring.

The fob attaches to the key ring and after you have it linked with the free Kensington Proximo app, anytime the devices are separated an alarm sounds. If your phone is within range but you can’t find it, press a button.

It’s easy to think of this as a monitoring device for your expensive smartphone but it also works in reverse once everything is linked up. With your phone in your pocket or purse, it can alert you that you have left your keys behind.

can be placed in a computer bag or attached to anything (or anyone) that you want alarmed. But unlike the fob, it’s only one direction; the app will find it but you can’t use it to find your phone.

The Proximo App Dashboard tracks up to five items with a single fob and up to four tags. Additional tags cost $24.99 each.

If you get out of range between the devices, an app lets you tap a button to let you know where your device was last seen and even pulls up a map with a specific address.

Details: www.Kensington.com

Sound investment

RadioShack’s Auvio expanding Bluetooth speaker ($39.99) is as simple and useful as a gadget can be. Just twist open the speaker, pair it with your device via Bluetooth and you’ll be amazed at how much better the sound is than the built-in speaker on your smartphone or tablet.

A rechargeable battery is built in for up to eight hours of use and can be powered up in two hours with a USB charge using the included cable.

It is 2.5 inches in diameter, just over 3-inches tall when expanded and about 2.5 inches when closed.

Another choice, with a bigger size (2.8-by-6.5-by-2.9 inches) but much better sound is the brick-shaped Auvio Portable Speaker ($79.99).

Both speakers have aux-in ports to connect to non-Bluetooth devices.

Details: www.radioshack.com

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Keys ‘Seahag’ gets 30 years for killing man who refused to give her a beer

Former Conch Key resident Carolyn Dukeshire has the next 30 years to think about the can of Busch Light beer she never got from neighbor Martin Mazur.

That's the reason Dukeshire, 62, shot and killed Mazur, 64, last July 29 — she asked Mazur for a beer and he said no. That's when she shot him five times outside his Conch Key home.

Dukeshire — known by her friends and co-workers as the Seahag — pleaded guilty to second-degree murder Thursday, accepting an agreement with the Monroe state attorney's office for a maximum 30 years in prison. Assistant Public Defender Patrick Stevens represented her.

A grand jury handed down a first-degree murder charge against Dukeshire in August.

Assistant State Attorney Tanner Demmery said Mazur's brother was at Thursday's hearing before acting Circuit Court Judge Ruth Becker.

"The brother of the victim, he elected to have the victim advocate read his prepared statement to the court. Ms. Dukeshire had no comment," he said.

Demmery said Dukeshire submitted a statement to Becker indicating her remorse and that she'd pay the rest of her life for losing composure in that moment.

A 17-year Keys resident, Dukeshire had no previous arrest history in Monroe County.

According to a Monroe County Sheriff's Office report, just before the shooting, Dukeshire reportedly asked Mazur, for whom she had previously done some lobster-trap work: "Do you have a cold beer for me?" He reportedly replied, "I have absolutely nothing for you."

That's when Dukeshire shot Mazur twice in the lower right abdomen, twice in the back and once in the right wrist.

Deputy Michael Claudy's report says "it seems apparent" Mazur was attempting to flee from the gunfire but collapsed near a tiki bar in his backyard.

Mazur's reported business partner, Casey Whippo, 30, witnessed the shooting and told police he struggled with Dukeshire for the gun. Sheriff's office divers recovered the small-caliber weapon the next day in a canal behind the house.

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Justin Timberlake Backtracks on Britney Spears Comments

Justin Timberlake finally returned to the stage on Saturday, but caused a bit of an uproar among Britney Spears fans when he spouted off some catty comments about his ex before going into his hit song Cry Me a River.

During his performance at Saturday's Super Bowl DirecTV party, Mr. J.T. introduced the song by saying to the crowd, "Sometimes in life, you think you found the one. But then one day you find out, that she is just some bitch!"

However, by Super Bowl Sunday, Timberlake was singing a different tune. The Suit & Tie singer, 32, tweeted: "Ok. I see you. Wouldn’t disrespect ANYONE personally. Ever. #Relax #ItsBritneyB**** I do love that saying though*with accent* #Respect."

RELATED VIDEOS: Timberlake Performs New Tracks

Whose side are you on? Team J.T. or Team Britney?

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WATCH: Cops hunt for suspect after man fatally gunned down in Queens

Police released surveillance video of the heartless thugs who gunned down an Upper West Side man in Queens on Saturday.

The gunman is seen in the video raising his arm, gun in hand, and going after the victim. He then turns and flees with his accomplice.

Francisco Leal, 27, was leaving a liquor store on 21st Street and 41st Avenue in Astoria, when the two men approached him at 9:40 p.m., family members told The Post.

The gunman then shot him twice in the chest, police said.

Leal was rushed to Mt. Sinai Hospital in Queens, where he later died from his injuries, police said.

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Bright spots in Latin America despite global economic uncertainty

There are bright spots as Latin American and Caribbean economies begin the year but the uncertain health of the U.S. economy, the lingering financial crisis in Europe and more sluggish growth in China are casting shadows over the region.

A decade ago, dim prospects in those major markets would have delivered a knock-out punch in the region, but this year Latin American and Caribbean economies are expected to grow by 3.5 percent and average 3.9 percent growth in 2014 and 2015, according to a World Bank forecast. The United Nations’ Economic Commission has a slightly more sanguine forecast of 3.8 percent growth in 2013.

Both are better than the 2.4 percent growth the World Bank is forecasting for the global economy and the mere 1.3 percent increase it is predicting for high-income countries.

The U.S. economy grew by 2.2 percent in 2012. But the economy shrank 0.1 percent in the fourth quarter and the first quarter of 2013 also could be sluggish..

“That creates a soggy start for 2013 in Latin America,’’ said David Malpass, president of Encima Global, a New York economic consulting and research firm.

With a recession in Japan, even slower growth expected in Europe than in the United States, and questions about whether the dip in the Chinese economy has bottomed out and whether the United States will be making sharp cuts in defense spending and other federal programs come March 1, Latin American and Caribbean nations can’t really depend on the industrialized world to spur growth.

The region must look inward and undertake structural reforms that will allow growth from domestic factors, said Malpass, who was in Miami in January for an event organized by the University of Miami’s Center for Hemispheric Policy.

Panama’s $5.25 billion investment in expansion of the Panama Canal is an example of the inward focus that will pay off down the road, said Malpass. By 2015, Panama plans to have completed two new sets of locks on the Atlantic and Pacific sides of the canal and the deepening and widening of existing channels to accommodate the so-called Post-Panamax ships too big to traverse the current locks.

“It’s a difficult period but a period where developing countries are growing solidly but not as quickly as they might otherwise want to,’’ said Andrew Burns, the lead author of the World Bank’s annual Global Economic Trends report.

That means they should focus on investment in infrastructure and healthcare, structural policies, regulatory reforms and improvements in governance that will pay future dividends down the road, Burns said.

Such economic reforms, plus high commodity prices enjoyed by countries with fertile fields and mineral wealth, helped the region move beyond the global financial crisis of 2008 and 2009 far more quickly than it did when it was so dependent on economic cycles in the rest of the world.

Economic growth slowed in Latin America and the Caribbean from 4.3 percent in 2011 to an estimated 3 percent but that was still better than the 1.3 percent growth high-income countries managed in 2012, according to The World Bank.

China will continue to play a major role in Latin America and the Caribbean this year but whether the slowdown in China has reached its low point is subject to debate. But it’s relative. Slow growth in China would be brisk growth elsewhere. China says its gross domestic product grew 7.8 percent in 2012, the most tepid growth in 13 years and a comedown from 9.3 percent growth in 2011.

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Insane City: Read excerpt from Dave Barry’s new book

After a block and a half they came to the Clevelander, a legendary South Beach bar bearing no resemblance to anything that has ever existed in Cleveland. On a small stage next to the packed bar a woman wearing a basically invisible bikini was writhing to inhumanly loud pounding music. Nearby, beneath a sign that said D.J. BOOGA WOOGA was a man wearing black lace-up boots and a purple thong held up by orange suspenders. He was shouting into a microphone: “LAST CALL FOR THE MISS HOT AMATEUR BOD CONTEST! LADIES COME ON UP! FIRST PRIZE IS ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS! COME ON LADIES! LET’S SEE WHAT YOU GOT!”

Standing near the DJ were a dozen young women wearing garments that, if all of them were combined, might have provided enough fabric to make a sock.

“We should stop here,” said Kevin.

“No we shouldn’t,” said Seth. “We need to get to the Ritz.”

“We can’t get to the Ritz,” said Kevin. “Admit it. We tried, and we failed.”

“Plus,” said Marty, “they don’t have Miss Hot Amateur Bod at the Ritz, not to mention D.J. Booga Wooga.”

Seth looked back out at Ocean Drive. Still no taxis.

“Maybe there’s a bus to Key Biscayne,” said Big Steve.

“Shut up, Steve,” said Kevin.

“Come on, Seth,” said Marty. “One drink.”

“OK,” said Seth, dragging his suitcase toward the bar. “One drink.”

* * *

Three hours later, they were on their fifth pitcher of margaritas. The pitchers were $50 apiece, plus a generous tip for Vicki the bartender, with whom Kevin had fallen deeply in love. Kevin was also in love with Cyndi Friend Gonzalez, an outgoing young woman who had finished fourth in the Miss Hot Amateur Bod competition, and who was wearing a dress made from roughly one square inch of some extremely stretchy material. At Kevin’s invitation, Cyndi had joined the Groom Posse at the bar; she had in turn been joined by a friend of hers, a large bald man named Duane.

The posse was not thrilled about Duane, but nobody told him to leave, because in addition to being large, he had an 11-foot Burmese albino python named Blossom draped over his shoulders. Duane made his living collecting tips from tourists who wanted to have their pictures taken with Blossom. He’d been doing this for eight years and considered himself a professional. He also considered himself an ambassador for Miami, and upon learning that Seth was about to get married, he had appointed himself as tour guide.

“This is my town,” he said. “ ¿Se hablo españolo? You need weed? Oxy?”

“I think we’re good,” said Seth.

Duane brandished Blossom. “You want to hold her? No charge for the groom, man.”

“Maybe later,” said Seth, leaning back to avoid Blossom’s flicking tongue.

“Just say the word,” said Duane, pouring Seth and himself another glass from the pitcher, finishing it. Kevin waved to Vicki for another.

The Clevelander was now very crowded and making far more noise than the entire state of Nebraska. The sea-salted night air was warm and sticky and thick with the aromas of spilled beer and cigar smoke and Axe body spray and billowing clouds of do-me perfume worn by women who were not wearing a whole lot else. Seth was staring at one of these women, wondering how she sat down in that dress and hoping she would attempt to do so soon, when he realized that Big Steve was shouting something into his ear, trying to be heard over the all-obliterating boom-boom issuing from the coffin-sized speakers of D.J. Booga Wooga.

“WHAT?” said Seth.

“THE HOTEL!” said Big Steve. He held up his phone so Seth could see the time: 9:30. Seth frowned. He swiveled toward Marty, grabbing the bar to keep from falling off the stool.

“MARTY.”

“WHAT?”

“WE NEED TO GET TO THE HOTEL!”

“WHAT?”

“THE HOTEL!”

Marty frowned deeply for several seconds, processing this concept, then said, “WHAT?”

“Never mind,” said Seth. Realizing it was time to take matters into his own hands, he turned away from Marty and slid smoothly off the stool. He continued sliding smoothly until he found himself on all fours under the bar. He decided to remain that way for a bit, collecting his thoughts.

He’d been down there a while and had yet to collect any when he became vaguely aware of voices shouting above him in the thumping din. He heard his name, and realized that the voices belonged to Marty, Big Steve and Kevin, who, apparently unaware that he was under the bar, were trying to figure out where he was.

“Hey!” said Seth. “Down here!”

They didn’t hear him. Their voices were louder now, and more concerned.

“Hey!” Seth repeated, again going unheard. He thought about attempting to stand up, but at the moment that didn’t seem to be a good idea, or even possible. He decided to collect his thoughts some more and soon fell asleep with his back against the bar.

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Adorable Tots: Celebs and their Cute Kids!

Jessica Simpson

They grow up so fast! Jessica Simpson shared an adorable pic of her daughter Maxwell standing up on Feb. 1, 2013, tweeting: "My lil dollface is 9 months today!"

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